When you are a gardener, plants die on your watch.  It's a fact of life, but it is not a moral failing--even if the plant or plants in question died of neglect.  Neglect just means that the plant didn't excite you very much or your life/schedule/obligations made it impossible for you to meet the plant's needs.  Either way, you should not feel guilty.  Next time, buy a plant that makes you happy and has requirements that fit your lifestyle.

Sometimes it is hard to let go of a plant--even if it is clearly dead.  Last year I kept a potted lavender on my dining room window seat/plant shelf long after it had died.  The lavender was a gift and it died for no apparent reason.  I kept hoping that one day I would see the single green sprout that would tell me my lavender was really only in some kind of dormancy.  I even watered my dead plant regularly.  Finally I brushed by it a little too hard and one of the larger branches broke off with a snap.  I pulled on one of the other branches and it was also well and truly dead.  In fact, all of the branches were dead because the entire plant was dead.  I finally tossed it into the composter. 

The same thing has happened to me many times with outdoor plants.  I have a Rosa rugosa hybrid right now that has only one living cane.  The plant has been at death's door for almost two years while I have dithered about whether or not to get ride of it.  This year I am going to do it--but only after early spring has passed, just in case Mother Nature decides to rejuvenate more canes.

When you contemplate dead or dying plants, it is helpful to remember that every dead plant opens up a space for something fresh and new.  Repeat those words whenever you start to  feel guilty.